Trip Videos Delayed

Thank you all for your patience. I have regressed health wise rapidly in the past few days, so I have been unable to edit and upload the videos. Unfortunately, I don't know when I will feel well enough to accomplish that. I haven't had IV hydration in exactly two weeks, and that appears to be about a week too long. Although I experienced symptoms after missing my first two infusions last week, I didn't not anticipate them snowballing so rapidly into something I cannot control. I am on the struggle bus bad right now. I am not consuming any food orally. It takes too much of my severely limited body water to process anything heavier than electrolytes and juice. I have limited my intake to hydration only. I am also having serious blood sugar issues if I am off the feeding pump for even an hour or if I try to dilute my formula to increase my water and electrolytes. I am losing my ability to function and pass as a human in a much more rapid fashion than I anticipated and it is accelerating every day. The pain is also increasing more rapidly than I would like. It feels like it's worsening every hour, though my coping mechanisms are diminishing the sicker I get and that could totally be in my head. I see my new PCP on Monday and all I can do is hope he is a miracle worker. I did not anticipate this much misery when we decided to move back to New England. I am going to believe this is a temporary hiccup and it will all be worth it in the end. Hopelessness just makes all of this worse. It is so easy to despair while in this much pain, but that doesn't help anyone. At the moment, hope is all I have, so to hope I cling.